I fired my secretary today....

Postby Wolv » Thu Feb 17, 2005 8:49 pm

Two weeks ago was my 35th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably would have a present for me.

As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember..

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday". And I felt a little better that someone had remembered.

I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!"

We went to lunch.

We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable"

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ----- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there ----on the couch ---- naked.
Last edited by Wolv on Thu Feb 17, 2005 8:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The charm of hunting is that it is the pursuit of that which is elusive but attainable, a perpetual series of occasions for hope.
Wolv
Forum Junkie
 
Posts: 2042
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2005 3:17 pm

Postby GTAce » Thu Feb 17, 2005 8:57 pm

:lolhit:

i think the wife should fire her husband
<!--QuoteBegin--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteEBegin-->(V) -=- Larry says:
me and draggy gonna fuck u up
syrus says:
it'll take two of you
|ESF{Draggy}ESF| says:
you cant touch me anymore and you know it
syrus says:
I'm coming hardcore now bitches
(V) -=- Larry says:
bring it
<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->Image
GTAce
Forum Junkie
 
Posts: 3213
Joined: Sat Oct 09, 2004 2:00 pm
Location: Athens, GA

Postby Slorg » Thu Feb 17, 2005 8:59 pm

Haha agreed.
Image
Slorg
Godlike Member
 
Posts: 1625
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:36 pm
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby Charisma » Thu Feb 17, 2005 9:33 pm

lmfaoooo that's not what i expected
Charisma
Forum Junkie
 
Posts: 2137
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 7:29 am
Location: Maryland

Postby syrus » Thu Feb 17, 2005 10:15 pm

LMFAO!!!
syrus
Godlike Member
 
Posts: 1637
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:00 am
Location: Southern California

Postby Hazerduz » Thu Feb 17, 2005 11:59 pm

:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:
Image
Hazerduz
Godlike Member
 
Posts: 1666
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 5:23 am
Location: San Antonio, TX

Postby cheese » Fri Feb 18, 2005 12:36 am

I would have fucked your secretary and tell your wife its her gift to you
cheese
Godlike Member
 
Posts: 1916
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 11:34 am
Location: Michigan

Postby B to the A » Fri Feb 18, 2005 4:01 am

:lolsign:
<!--QuoteBegin-Jalapeno+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Jalapeno)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteEBegin-->no mercy, cheese<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
<!--QuoteBegin-CRaZy)%(ØR§®+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(CRaZy)%(ØR§®)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteEBegin--> i said run motha f***er we're about to get owned.. <!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
<a href='http://www.esf4life.com' target='_blank'>Image</a>
B to the A
Member
 
Posts: 171
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:53 pm

Postby spotongaming » Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:46 am

Sounds more like a life experience to me lol
spotongaming
Lurker
 
Posts: 11
Joined: Thu Feb 17, 2005 8:59 pm
Location: Shrewsbury,UK

Postby WhiteWolfette » Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:47 am

LOL
¤SlorgsSweetie¤
Image
WhiteWolfette
Godlike Member
 
Posts: 1232
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:36 pm
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby HoRnY » Fri Feb 18, 2005 10:43 am

lol, good one Wolv.
<span style='color:crimson'><span style='font-size:9pt;line-height:100%'>ROLL TIDE</span></span>
HoRnY
Elite Member
 
Posts: 937
Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2004 9:23 pm

Postby ViXen » Fri Feb 18, 2005 12:15 pm

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! :lol:
sometimes..... maybe once or twice.
ViXen
Member
 
Posts: 184
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 8:14 pm

Postby Dewmie » Fri Feb 18, 2005 12:54 pm

most excellent
<a href='http://profile.xfire.com/dewmgheyz' target='_blank'>Image</a>
Dewmie
Senior Member
 
Posts: 588
Joined: Wed Nov 10, 2004 9:17 pm


Return to Jokes

cron